Checked Into Chateau du Chrestman

After a tumultuous morning consisting of a circumcision and breaking out into baby acne, Kohl’s day took a turn for the better when he was finally discharged from the hospital and arrived home.  He seemed intrigued with the concept of direct sunlight on the walk in the parking lot to the car, and he was taking it all in during the car ride home until Mom and Dad’s personalized tour sent him off to dream land.
Mom and Dad’s boring city tour made his meeting with Abbie the Dog anticlimactic.  While Abbie was blown over with excitement, young Kohl slept right through it, including the part where Abbie attempted to playfully put one of his little feet in her mouth.  During every meltdown due to diaper or wardrobe changes, Abbie the dog darted upstairs to Kohl’s nursery, looking thoroughly confused at this creature that is so tiny, yet emits such loud noises and noxious odors.  But her confusion is also borne of love because her expression suggested that she desperately wanted to help console him.  Limited by the lack of opposable thumbs, however, Abbie simply sniffed his scalp and licked his face to let him know that she loves him.
It was a busy day, but here are a few sub-par pictures of the trip home:
Nothing like sleeping in your own bed
“Is it a chew toy or is it my tiny friend? As much as I love chew toys, I sincerely hope it is my friend.”
Kohl takes it all in during his city tour.  Seconds later, he would be fast asleep.
Ready for his journey


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Homeward Bound

No parent ever wants to brag about how much their child drank over the weekend… but Kohl drank himself under the table. During the last couple of weeks, Mom and Dad have been monitoring how many CCs of breast milk Kohl drinks very closely because his trip home to Chateau du Chrestman depends most largely on his ability to drink from the bottle instead of getting his nutrients through the nasal gastric (“NG”) tube.  He started slow — taking 5 CCs here, 13 CCs there.  But almost sensing Abbie the dog’s yearning for Kohl’s arrival home, the little man stepped up his game this weekend and got the hang of bottle feeding.

Mom marvels at the empty bottle that was previously filled with 70 CCs of pure gold.  Kohl is content on mommy’s lap, and there is a strong likelihood that he was filling up his diaper as this photo was being taken.
Diaper and wardrobe changes no longer phase this miniature Al Bundy

He did so well over the weekend and on Monday that his NG tube got removed, and he gets to go home this Thursday!  Here are a few pics of Kohl sans NG tube:

Looking for binky
Binky found

Other weekend highlights included being held for the first time by numerous aunts and uncles and letting out a fart so loud that he startled himself.  He and Abbie the Dog already have something in common.

 
Employing an unorthodox baby-holding technique, Uncle Andrew is infatuated with his tiny friend
After showing Uncle Andrew the more traditional way to hold a baby, Aunt Brooke displays a knack for motherhood
Aunt Allison is thrilled to hold her nephew for the first time.  Kohl loves his Aunt Allison too, and if he continues to drink his milk at the rate he is, he will quickly tower over Aunt Allison’s commanding 5-foot frame
Kohl knows that his Uncle Mark is a good guy but is visibly upset when he sees Uncle Mark’s “Bama Bangs” and discovers that he rolls with the tide.  But Kohl looks forward to having the last laugh and getting to make fun of his Uncle Mark after Nick Saban leaves Alabama for a failed bout with a weak Big Ten school sending the Tide back to the irrelevant state in which they belong.  Tiger Bait!

Mom and Dad are elated and cannot wait to be clueless about what to do with their newborn baby at night when the fantastic NICU nurses aren’t there to supervise.  The best way to learn how to swim, however, is to jump in the deep end.  Deep end, here we come.



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Check Out My Crib

You always hear parents lament how quickly their kids seem to grow up.   One minute, you’re changing their pampers and the next minute, they’re off to college.

To Nanna and Pop, it does not seem that long ago that Kohl’s dad was running around the bathroom naked and pretending to be a butterfly after bathtime, causing Pop to hold his head in his hand in utter disappointment.

It seems like only yesterday that G-Daddy and CeCe encouraged Sarah not to let her corrective leg braces stop her superpowers from being unleashed as She-ra the Warrior Princess:

With the sword, she battled the forces evil.  With the shield, she protected the meek.  She truly was the Princess of Power.
The Forrest Gump-esque leg braces did not make the Princess of Power any less lethal to her enemies.

It is indeed truly amazing how fast we all grow up.  Today was such a moment as Kohl transitioned to a big-boy crib.

The creepy lamb that hovers over Kohl doesn’t seem so imposing in the big boy crib.  Guess what, Lamb, Kohl is a big boy now, and he ain’t scared.

The crib might make him look even tinier than before, but the little man used it as motivation to gulp down 28 CCs of pure gold at this evening’s attempt at bottle feeding.  The doctor also decided to increase the frequency of his bottle feedings from twice a day to every other feeding.  Kohl’s discharge from the hospital seems like a not-too-distant reality, and he can finally meet his friend Abbie the Dog.

Wallowing in a constant state of depression, Abbie the Dog yearns for the day she can be bitten, poked, prodded, and ridden by one Kohler Henson Chrestman

 The miracle continues …



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